I'll sleep on it

Now that I am officially 30 years old, it is about time I start acting like a grown up. Case in point, my bed. I sold off or donated all of my furniture (with the exception of a futon) when I left NYC. When I arrived back in Chicago, I found my condo nearly fully furnished by my roommate. When she moved out, I continued to sleep on the futon for some sad stupid reason. Yes, quite pathetic of me…sleeping on a futon in a completely bare apartment (well except for the cardboard boxes I was using as coffee tables)…where am I living, a frat house! Fast forward two months later (yes TWO whole MONTHS), I woke up and realized “what the hell am I doing this for”. I set out to Ikea to buy furniture like a real table, chairs, bookshelf, and a sweet bed headboard/footboard. The bed frame reminds me of something from an old Italian movie with wrought iron half-dome and spindles.

Now I needed an equally impressive mattress to put into the frame. Being that I am a huge nerd, I researched the various types of mattresses online. I printed out the discount prices from Overstock and Amazon and the consumer reports for the different brands/styles. Then I visited a real mattress store so I could try out the actual mattress and price compare. The first store was completely empty except for the lone saleswoman who was on the phone with a friend talking about some boy or date she had. She cheerfully ushered me over to a bed when I told her I was thinking about buying one. She then casually asked what style I was interested in, and I admitted that according to my research I would probably like a firm or euro-top mattress. I pulled out my research which she snatched out of my hands and then started to flip through. She praised me on all the highlighting and consumer report notes. I said that wanted to price compare local stores to the internet because if they were relatively the same price, then I would love to buy local. She then thrust my papers back at me and gave me a whole earful of preaching…”well, so you are just going to waste my time right…I mean you are just using me to try out the beds and are then going to buy it online…we are a respectful business…we are even part of the better business bureau and are you totally acting all disrespectful and wasting my time…I’m going to have to ask you to leave.” And with that, she stormed over to the desk and got back on her cell phone. I thought “really, I am wasting YOUR time, but what else have you got to do besides gossip with your friends, the store is freaking EMPTY!” I quietly left the store and thought up of some good zingers as I walked down the street.

I went to another mattress store. Again, completely empty except for the saleswoman and myself. After trying out a few beds, I had narrowed my choice down to one. I explained to the saleslady that the internet actually had this same mattress for $100 less. She quickly said “okay, no problem, we price match, where did you find it”. She then threw in free shipping to seal the deal. Love her! I wondered if they cut a deal for everyone, or just me because it was obviously a slow day and both the saleslady and I lived in ghetto uptown. Seriously she asked me how the Aldi was (and then I raved for 10 minutes about how awesome it is). She then said “well, I never go there because walking to the Aldi takes you through all the really nasty ghetto places and frankly it scares me…I can’t believe a little white girl like you even goes.” What can I say, the hood suits me well.