Wednesday, August 13, 2008

Meat on the street

Thankfully, I can look back and laugh at these two stories.
Marathon Man is an avid runner. Well during one run in Central Park, he twisted his ankle bad. No broken bones, just a really bad sprain. I went over to his apartment to help out the poor invalid and play the part of dutiful girlfriend. The first task was to help him hobble over to the bathroom. As soon as I turned my back so he could have some privacy while he peed, I heard a CRACK and a “oh shit”. He was using the towel bar as support and it snapped in half. I then assisted him back to the bed and offered to get him some aspirin. With the best intentions, I filled up a giant glass of water for him to take the aspirin with. Well when I handed him the glass, I accidentally bonked him hard in the head and then dropped the glass in shock. The glass landed in the bed and flooded the mattress and sheets with water. I caught a look from him that read “do you know how hard it is going to be to get back out of bed”. I laid some towels over the wet spots (like what you do with a kid when they wet the bed) and had to stifle laugher because the whole situation was fucking hilarious.

In other invalid news, I got sick for the second time in my adult life. I grabbed a kabob from a street vender and 12 hours later I was puking my head off. I literally puked every half hour from 2am to noon. After the first five or six vomiting sessions, I had completely voided all food in my system. The sessions that followed were a mix of water and stomach bile. I kept drinking lots of water even though I knew it would come back up with a vengeance in 10 minutes. Luckily, that afternoon the vomiting ceased and my fever broke. I ended up loosing 6 pounds in 48 hours. Yep, that is like equivalent to loosing my entire foot. I’m eating solid foods now and for once trying to put the weight back on. The only lesson I learned was not to eat unprocessed meat from a street vendor and that day time TV sucks.


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