They're heeerrrrreee

I head over Marathon-Man’s place for date night. Upon entering his apartment, I find the place in complete disarray. He explained that he left his window open while he was at work because it was such a nice day outside. Well the damn pigeons figured out how to get around the metal grate in place designed to keep said pest out. When M-Man came home, he found that the pigeons have made themselves at home and shit all over his computer, dishes, and bedspread. In fact, the little fuckers were just hanging out on the bed when he walked in and gave him a look like “oh, you again, (sigh)”. He eventually was able to chase them out of his apartment but not before they fully shit bombed all over the place.

Later, we were watching a movie and I swear I heard the flapping of bird wings. I looked around and didn’t see anything so I marked that one down for good sound effects. Well, I continued to hear the clacking of little clawed feet walking around. At first I thought it was just the pigeons paroling outside the windows because they are stalking us, but the more I listened, I swear it was coming from inside the apartment. Well I started to get anxious because I was trapped in the fear of “are they or aren’t they in the apartment” feeling. You know, like that scene in Aliens where they have that glowing beeping hand held device that tells them how many meters the Aliens are away and then they say “8 meters, that is impossible, that is inside the room” and then they look above the ceiling and they attack! Okay, so you get the picture. Well I am sitting there on edge when all of a sudden a pigeon burst forth from the bathroom and flew at the window. You would have thought it attacked me personally based on the high pitched scream I let out. Next thing I know, M-Man is running after it wielding a pillow. Ah ha ha ha.