Mother knows best - part one

My mother visited me for one last chance to snatch up cheap designer knock-offs before I move. She has visited the city a total of four times in the last two years, so we had to come up with some pretty original tourist activities since she has SEEN EVERYTHING! Granted, I am sure she would be perfectly content spending the days shopping on Canal Street and evenings at various Broadway Musicals.

I whisked her down to the famed Coney Island on the first vacation day. I made her eat a famous Nathan’s hotdog while we laid out on the beach. The great thing about the beach is that the open container law is flat out ignored. Men in floppy hats and backpacks wander around peddling “water, soda, corona!” We took a ride on the Wonder Wheel (Ferris wheel on crack) and she was embarrassed to admit I was related to her when I started freaking out at the top. Yeah, my fear of heights is just getting worse with age. The other couple in the cage with us was all of 15 years old and couldn’t stop laughing at the “girl who couldn’t stop screaming for her life”.

For next to nothing admission, we caught the Coney Island freak/side show. Like the last time I saw the show, most acts are sub par except the fantastic (and probably hairless) fire eating woman and the one guy who stuck a moving drill with a 8” long masonry bit up his nose.

While down there, we took advantage of the free admission to the Brooklyn Aquarium. I’m a bit spoiled being raised near one of the greatest aquariums in the states, so I found it lackluster. They did do a live feeding in one of the tanks, so even the reclusive eels came out to chow down. Creepy. Other highlights were the jellyfish exhibit and the lumbering (and surprisingly hypnotic) walrus who seriously needed to call Jenny Craig. Oh and did I mention the sharks? I was a little disappointed they were all cooped up in a small tank filled with other sea life like stingrays and turtles.

We finished the day at the famous Totonos Pizzeria. I’ve tried to get into this pizza place twice before only to be turned off by the hours long line snaked around the block. It was totally worth the wait and anticipation.

During the nights we caught the musicals ‘Jersey Boys’ and ‘A Chorus Line’. Go see ‘Jersey Boys’. It is worth the ticket price and anyone over the age of 50 will have the absolute best time ever. Also ‘A Chorus Line’ currently is starring Mario Lopez. He doesn’t do much acting at all, but his dancing is on par with the other professional dancers. Plus the irony is that his character is named aptly “Zach”. Ah ha ha.